Mock Crashs & Feelings

Yesterday (Friday) a committee in the Leadership class puts on a 'Mock Crash' with actors, already crashed cars, fake blood and wounds, real cops, firefighters and parametics. The whole sha-bang. Here is a little video of it:

Now, here's something you didn't know about me: On December 30th, 2010, my family and I were in a car accident. The road was icy and there was nothing my dad could do to control the car. we slid into the lane next to us, the car turned so we were no longer parallel with the road, we hit a sign and rolled one and a half times, so we landed upside-down. All of us were wearing our seatbelts, so our physical injurys consisted of scrapes, cuts, and whiplash. My worst injury was not physical; it was emotional. I decided to not cry or scream. I decided to push all of what I was feeling away to take care of my sister while my brotheres and dad were watching over my unconsious mom. I couldn't handle what happend. After, I had the worst time being in cars because I would hear a sound, or feel a movement that I heard or felt when we rolled. I cried myself to sleep for six months, I prayed and prayed that I would be okay, that what I was feeling would go away. That I could live my life again. But nothing happend. (Note: I never ever thought God was abandoning me. Or thought why he wasn't answering my prayers yet.). Eventually, my best friend and I were sitting on the floor of her kitchen, the moon being our source of light, I told her my feelings. She urged me to talk to my momma, and I did.

Well. The mock crash brought back some of the feelings I felt as I watch a girl scream because her friend was dead, the confusion they showed. Everything. I cried. I felt like an idiot, this wasn't real, why is it making me upset?
And today I realized that it is okay. I am a very senstive, empathetic person. I cry alot. These are all facts about me that will probably never change, and that too is okay. I AM A HUMAN. these things happen! I love who I am and if i feel like crying, heck! I'll cry! (I can't really control it sometimes either... ha) I cry when I am happy, when something touches my heart, when I am sad, etc. SO there is really no avoiding it (;
Anyways, here is a picture of the car (in case you were wondering) when it rolled:

On a completely other note go check this out, it is the cutest thing ever! Side by side survival guide

Have a good weekend!

Xx Kay

(photos from dad)

No comments:

Post a Comment